Re: What to Wear to Court

Before becoming a lawyer... my idea of what people wore to court was considerably off.  In my head people didn't step into the courthouse unless they were dressed in their best church clothes (and if they didn't go to church in their best first date clothes). I thought not only would the clients be dressed the best they could possibly dress in order to impress the judge but also all of the lawyers would be in their freshest and most sleek attire.  Though, this last part may have to do with the fact that you constantly hear that you must wear black close toed pumps, drab dress suits, and an assortment of either black, gray, dark blue, or white to court.

The first few times I go to court, my life is a blur because I'm too nervous to observe what people are wearing.  It isn't until I go a few times that I realize.. not everyone is quite as nicely dressed as I expected them. In actuality, even some of the lawyers are rather flustered and looking disheveled. One woman actually had on an outfit from the 80's.  Her hair was full of frizz and hardly combed.  She had on white flip flops, and a blue short sleeve long dress with orange and white triangular patterns across her chest. SERIOUSLY?

The second most offensive non lawylerly attire on a lawyer in court appeared a few months later.  The lawyer was called up to the bench to discuss settlement options. She had on a black knit cardigan/shawl that resembled those blankets you have at your grandmothers that really don't keep you warm because they have holes all over them. This cardigan hung slightly below the woman's black knit skirt that was about 5 inches above her knee. She topped it off with some black go-go boots that had fringe hanging from the knee. Yes, I said fringe.

I won't mention the ill fitting suits because frankly, I get it. There is a lot of stress in this job and finding a suit to fit takes not only time, but also being able to continuously being able to fit into that suit for a consistent period of time which also means finding time to work out.  However, I do have a few suggestions later on to discuss the mention how you can find clothes at an affordable price to fit you and your budget. (I'll get to that at a later date)

If I were a judge I would be soooooooooo upset seeing people dressed the way I've seen. I've decided I'd write a letter to my future clients in order to prepare them for court. However, this doesn't JUST apply to them, but it also applies to you lawyers.

Dear Client,

I understand that this is a very depressing time for you not only emotionally, but also financially.  During this time, I get that you cannot go to the mall and pick out clothes at expensive boutiques just to wear to Court. However, when you roll out of bed in the morning, what you wore to sleep in is not the proper attire to address the Judge. Things to avoid that I have seen in court are:

1.  Pajamas of any form or kind. This includes the house slippers that you wore around your house as well. I don't know who raised you but if you think wearing pajamas to anything but bed is acceptable and will have a Court of Law render any type of beneficial decision for you, think again.  Pajamas are not even acceptable if you have the flue and have to come to court.
2. Sweat pants: These are a form of lounge attire that you should only wear around the home and to bed.
3. Jeans: These are fantastic for a weekend out, a second date, going out to the club, or even casual Friday. The Court system should NOT be seen as casual Friday.  Perhaps a dark wash is acceptable, but please refrain from any with holes in them, studs on the pocket, or extremely tight jeans. 
4. T Shirts: Pay close attention to any messages that state alcohol, school logos, or drug paraphenalia can and will be used against you in a court of law. 
5. Any shirt that is excessively revealing. This includes bedazzled halter tops, tube tops, or simple spaghetti tanks. We understand this is how you normally attract the fellows, but the judge will NOT be impressed with your butterfly tattoo sprawled across your chest.(Also, wear a bra. If you can see the straps then that's a good sign that you should be wearing a more conservative shirt.)
6. A Goodyear shirt that you haven't washed in 6 months. Please, really, don't do this.

If you have any questions regarding what is proper attire and what is not, just let me know.  I like to think of what you would wear to court as what you would want to wear to church, a first date, or even a family holiday.  Please refrain from anything you could wear to bed, or to a slumber party.

Thank you,

Lady Hearsay